How are you doing? Really, how are YOU doing? In asking other people how they are doing, I have generally heard the answer, “good,” and then a pause, followed by a “well….” and we jump into a list of things that including “excesses” and “deficits,” otherwise known as “mores” and “less thans.” More tantrums, crying, frustration, screen time, online burnout…more overall stress. And then the deficits. Lower motivation, less time and space to exercise, outdoor time (so cold lately), missing connection with friends and family, less energy to meet life’s demands.
Most people I have talked to are having a tough time. But how do you know if you are coping or not? What is coping? What does it look like for you?
So, the first question, are you coping or not and how do you know? I’ve heard a good phrase recently; A problem is not a problem until it becomes a problem. Can you get out of bed? Can you make it to the shower? Are you getting to work? Can you meet your daily life’s demands? The American Psychological Association defines coping as the use of strategies (thinking/cognitive or behavioral) to manage the demands of the situation, when such demands exceed our own personal resources; or how we reduce the impact of stress. So, what we do to make things more manageable when we feel, well, “zoomed out.”
How do you cope? I can tell you how I cope. The most important thing for me (and the hardest, of course) is setting boundaries, saying ‘no,’ and not doing too much.’ As much as I’d like to connect with everyone on Zoom, I often get ‘zoomed-out.’ As hard as it is to say no to these (sometimes) it is nice to just sit and be. But then I know the importance of connection and how that can fuel me and my overall motivation to get things done in life. Again, balance is hard, but I’m trying (as I know you are too!). There are other ways to cope. This can include a conscious approach to problem-solving, a thought process when meeting a stressful situation, or how you try to modify your reaction to a situation.
I wish I could tell you the best way to cope, or how to cope with Covid, but please know you’re not alone out there. Think about it, how do you cope? Are you coping? And if not, please reach out to your Connecting Dots team. We’re here to help you figure out the best way for you and your family to cope through Covid. And I say “through” because we ARE going to get to the other side of this. xo
For more information on coping: https://dictionary.apa.org/coping